Hypocrisy on Tap at the Girl Scouts of America

Love it or hate it, one of the most popular cannabis strains over the past decade has been the NorCal hybrid known as Girl Scout Cookies.

Countless crosses have been created using the already-mixed lineage of GSC and one Bay Area rapper even launched a highly successful apparel and lifestyle brand based off the strength of the name and his spot in the game.

But even if you are a fan of the strain (or the clothing), you gotta admit that when you hear the words Girl Scout Cookies, you’re probably thinking about some actual delicious snacks first since most of us grew up smashing boxes of Thin Mints and Do-Si-Dos cookies that were delivered right to your door way before Amazon.

Of course, both Thin Mints and Do-Si-Dos have also had their names appropriated into the cannabis lexicon as the names of two different variations of the base strain of Girl Scout Cookies and while this may invoke feelings of nostalgia (and spark sales) with cannabis consumers, the actual Girl Scouts of America organization is not catching those same feelings, at all.

You may have seen headlines in the past couple of years of capitalist-minded tots setting up shop to slang their fundraising boxes of cookies and treats right outside of legal cannabis dispensaries.

As trivial or patronizing as it sounds, it worked!

One Scout in San Diego sold 300 boxes outside of Urbn Leaf, a state-licensed retail dispensary. She did so in just six hours.

A 9-year-old in Canada caught wind of the plot and emulated it there on October 17th, 2018, the very day that our neighbors to the north legalized the adult use and sale of the plant nationwide. She too sold out in a matter of hours.

In April of last year, a YouGov.com poll of just under 7,000 Americans revealed that 67% of those polled said that a Girl Scout should be able to sell her cookies in front of a legal dispensary.

Those opposed matched those unsure at 17% and 16%, but let’s face it they’re both confused.

Those opposed said that the young Scout should not sell their wares in front of “controversial” places like a pot shop. Meanwhile they’d surely have no problem with that same Scout posting up outside a Walgreens pharmacy full of Jack Daniel’s and OxyContin.

But it is not just a few squeaky wheels in a random internet poll that are taking issue with the blooming association between the cannabis culture and the tradition of Scouting.

Dating back as far as January of 2017, the Girl Scouts of America has been threatening legal action against anyone in the cannabis space that stands to profit off of their name.

They even began sending Cease & Desist letters to some of the most popular dispensaries in California, like Magnolia Wellness in the Bay Area who decided to yank all GSC-labeled products from their shelves. Rather than face the wrath of the Girl Scouts legal team and the unbalanced PR storm to follow, Magnolia decided to require a renaming of these products if they were to make it back on the shelf there. If it couldn’t be renamed or relabeled, it was returned to the grower or manufacturer.

Now, clearly, the Girl Scouts of America may have won that battle, but they have not won the war as Cookies has gone from being just a strain to now a chain of legal, state-sanctioned dispensaries on top of their expansion of their clothing outlets and the strain can be found on hundreds of menus from coast to coast.

This week, though, we saw an ad on social media whose hypocrisy was shocking, even for us.

It reads: We're excited to once again be partnering with Girl Scouts for Cookies On Tap!

Feb 22-24, join us for expertly paired flights of cookies and beer at all San Diego County Stone Brewing locations as well as Stone Brewing Napa and Stone Brewing Richmond. Each flight helps support local Girl Scouts chapters!

This year's pairings:

- Samoas w/ Stone Tropic Of Thunder Lager

- Savannah Smiles w/ Stone White Geist Berliner Weisse (brewed at Stone Brewing Berlin)

- S'mores w/ Mikhail (Stone Totalitarian Imperial Russian Stout aged in Bourbon Barrels)

- Thin Mints w Enter Night Pilsner (A collaboration between Arrogant Consortia x Metallica)

Details at stonebrewing. com/events. (21+ to drink)

Got it? Pairing Girl Scout Cookies with high ABV beers and the best part…you can even bring your adolescent Girls Scout with you, just don’t give them any booze!

Can you imagine the goddamn outrage if the Girl Scouts “partnered” with a legal cannabis company to promote a product that doesn’t lead to tens of thousands of auto fatalities, tens of thousands of liver and heart related cases, and countless instances of violence and domestic abuse against women?

Hell, we wouldn’t even need to use imagery of demons or devils to do it!

Hypocrisy is on tap and it seems that everybody is taking a biiiiig siiiiiip these days.

Wait and watch, though. As soon as the feds make a move and that cannabis dollar is truly a safe dollar, companies like Stone Brewing and maybe even the Girl Scouts of America will be first in line to stake their claim. We’ve got more on that topic in our next article – stay tuned!

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